Drained

Mood: Depressed

Pain Scale: 8



I am sooo tired today. The littlest things seem to overwhelm me. I just want to curl up in a ball on my comfortable bed and go to sleep and shut out the world. On the other hand I hate being in the house we once called ours. The house we bought to start a family in. The memories I see as I look around drain and depress me too. I feel there isn't anywhere for me to go...I can't get away. I'm stuck in this horrible hell where change I didn't choose is imminent but I have no control on when it will happen. I wish the damn house would sell already so I could get the fuck out of dodge.



I just can't wait for it to be behind me already. I hope the next upcoming years go by quickly. I feel like it will take forever for my heart and soul to heal from soooo much pain. At this time, I also can't wait not to see HER ever again. I don't want her in my life. She has taken so much from me that I can't see even being friends with her. She has yet to realize this even though I tell her over and over again I don't want to know her anymore.



She is in denial. And I think a small part of her still thinks I will come back to her abusive ways. Ummmmm...NO WAY. Things won't change.



I gave you a second chance and look how that turned out for me. HORRIBLE. Fuck you! I'M moving on with my life WITHOUT you. I don't deserve that kind of bullshit and I know that you will never change. I don't believe any of the lies you try to fill my head with. You do not love me.



Goodbye.