The Wall

Ok...here's the crazy random curved wall (with an extra Bucket photo op bonus)!




Any ideas?? The living room is painted a muted purplish color (called clay pot). This wall faces the front door as you walk in. It seperates the living room from the kitchen. Livingroom on the left side, dining room on the right side. There is a counter and cabnits on the back side, so a bar or window is out!! The wall also has a pretty good curve to it.

Ideas I've had but am still diliberating on or they've been vetoed:

1. Cover it with different sized picture frames (would have to be small cause it's curved)
2. Paint a mural (not so good at drawing art and what kind of mural)
3. Make lipstick kisses in random waves and swirls
4. Cover in different fabrics or papers (sorta like a modern scrap book design)

So...I'm up for suggestions. I wish the person who built this wall was around to thunk on the head and say "What the hell were you thinking?"

I got tickets to the gun show!!

Mood: visions of success
Pain Scale: 6

I enrolled in the gym today!! I figured it's time to start toning up again. I am usually a gym goer, but haven't gone since last summer. It's time. I signed up for Gold's Gym which is only 3 blocks from me, which I hope will encourage my lazy ass to go. I've heard that Gold's is full of meat heads, but I'm going to try it out any way. It didn't look to meaty when I was in there. I'll let you know how it goes.

Started seeing a chiropracter again because my back is killing me and I'm sure J will be kicking me off the health insurance any day now so I better use it while I can. It's actually helping me out a lot, my pain has diminished some what with only 2 visits.

I also have a project for webland, but I have to wait to post the picture of the wall I'm talking about. I need decorating ideas. It's a weird shaped wall and I haven't liked any of my ideas up to this point, so I'm going to send it out to you all to give me some suggetions!

Wierd Feelings

Mood: Flash back fever
Pain Scale: 4

I don't know if it's just the time of year or the fact J has contacted me recently, but I keep getting wierd flash back feelings of the tramatic events of last year. I keep thinking "Wow, it's been almost a year...a month from now I found out J was not what she seemed and my world changed as I knew it. How could she have treated me so awfully?? What the hell happend??"

Sometimes I miss her tremendously and then the next minute I truly hate her. I still haven't spoken to her since I vowed not to. That was a good move on my part. But every so often she sends me a text or email. Part of me thinks it's just another way for her to mentally torment me, because each time she does it, it takes time to get her out of my head again. Sometimes I just want to simply reply back "LOOSE THIS NUMBER!!!" but I know that would just prompt more contact. ERRRRRRRRRRRRRGGG!!

It really effects my view of relationships now. I don't think I will ever fully trust that I won't be left again for somone else no matter how much I'm reassured. I feel like she destroyed some of my innocence. I try not to be tainted...but I am. Now I know what people mean when they say they have baggage. YUCK.

But things with 15 are swell even with a my occasional emotional speed bumps!! We are planning a trip to Hawaii in September! I can't wait for that. It feels like forever since I've had a "real" vacation!! I can't wait to actually spend a full week with her!! And it must be going good, cause I've gained 5 lbs!!! Damn it!!